I like to keep an eye on which search terms are successfully used to find CnV. For the last few months the most common by far has been 'William Shatner Common People', or some such combination. The recent release of Duran Duran's single Sunrise has prompted a bunch of Durannies to start searching for terms like 'Simon and John', which chucks up a post. And, of course, I'm now doing rather well for the term 'Simon Pegg', popping up on page one in most search engines (sorry, Simon).

So far, so normal. But I do feel a strange sense of pride having discovered that I am ranked first for the term 'chocolate fuck' in Google Japan. This rather reminds me of Tom's 'Womble porn' string which he has 'owned' for a while now.

I think I can guess what the person searching for 'chocolate fuck' was looking for, and they must have been terribly disappointed by what they found here. My advice? Have a chunk of Green & Black's 70% Organic Dark Chocolate and learn to use your imagination instead.